Beauty. ", 4. This is extremely immature, and will show him that you’re not taking him seriously. We’re all a work in progress. “When I’m in the presence of a man who drops into his vulnerability and allows me to witness his emotional expression, my immediate thought is “Wow, this guy is brave, he’s a true leader and I am honoured to be in the presence of such honesty.” For me, I see men’s expression of vulnerability as strength. It took trauma plus a friendship with a very emotional roommate to make me start to become more comfortable with my own emotions. Years ago, before I had ever really thought about any of these things, I broke up with my boyfriend and he completely broke down in tears. Have you ever cried and had someone tell you “don’t cry”? Over the last few years, I have made friends with the full spectrum of my emotional self, and accepted it all once more. If a woman cry for her man it is normal. As a social species we all have core needs for love, safety and belonging. I am just as likely to cry when I'm sad as I am when I'm angry or scared or frustrated. Enter your email address now and get FREE access to my book 50 Powerful Date Ideas, as well as regular updates about my newest articles and offerings. For more of her work, check out her Tumblr. I couldn't think of anything so I just hugged her. My wish is to hold space for him, in the best way that I know how. I believe crying is a doorway to intimacy, once it is open the other person can walk in and see who we really are – a perfectly messy and beautiful expression of human love. Men feel a lot of pressure, and are always the strong one in all relationships. They don’t get too mad, or sad, or worked up in ways that would generate tears or alert anyone to a lack of emotional range. I do know that I feel better after I cry, so I can appreciate what might be appealing to people about that wrung-out lightness that comes after a good bout of sobbing. It takes fucking balls (or ovaries) to challenge our conditioning. The tears of another could make them incredibly uncomfortable, as they aren’t something these men had ever really learned how to deal with. I get red in weird places and snot is somehow almost immediately everywhere. Because you cannot fully express yourself to her. It makes me feel weak and dumb and useless. “There was a point in my life when I would have said seeing men cry did make me uncomfortable. But then she said that if she saw him crying for just about any other reason at all, she’d think less of him. I don't like crying. My sadness and I are now good friends. I didn’t like seeing men cry in movies, and I especially didn’t like seeing my dad cry. The idea that women can’t accept male emotions is completely false. My friend said that when a man cries in front of his woman, it’s a sign of weakness and she’d prefer a man who’d just toughen up. My husband has always been compassionate and comforting when I have cried, and I love that he trusts me to be the strong one for him when he needs support. 7 Reasons Crying Is Actually Good For You, 7. It’s always seemed to me that the men I’ve known who allow themselves to cry in front of others, or cry at all for that matter, are the ones that appear to experience all of life at greater depths. Suppressing our emotions to fit some arbitrary gender-box is a significant factor in what leads men to become suicide statistics, mass shooters, rapists, and murderers. “Having been raised in a society where I have been taught from a young age that simply: girls cry, and boys don’t. It shows that he is comfortable in his masculinity, and that he trusts in our relationship enough to be vulnerable.”, When you cry my heart cracks open. But it's sooo amusing to see a beautiful woman break down in tears. ", RELATED: Don't Hold Back! I had taken on the conditioned message that ‘boys don’t cry’ and a belief that told me that women felt repulsed by men who felt their feelings. When a beautiful woman cries in front of me, I don't give any help at all. How do you feel? To see my partner break down and cry has always been a reminder that he feels just as deep as I do. As a deeply feeling person, relationships and communication have always been easier for me with men who feel deeply as well. ", 5. If you’ve read Gillian Flynn’s bestseller Gone Girl, or if you’ve seen the movie directed by David Fincher, you’re probably familiar with the famed ‘Cool Girl’ passage, wherein the main character, Amy Dunne, describes the kind of girl that every man supposedly wants. Just as long as they’re breaking down in tears over a Save the Children commercial every other hour the way a super emotional woman would! There have been many times during our 37 year marriage when my husband has cried in front of me. I do my best to recognize it’s not my job to fix him, save him, or mother him till he feels “better”. It shows a man has mastered himself to the point where he faces everything he’s got in order to progress through it. And you probably won’t see him cry again if you keep letting him know that you’re shocked by his tears. Making a big fuss over his tears is also not the way to go. Just as long as they’re breaking down in tears over a Save the Children commercial every other hour the way a super emotional woman would! All information found on this site (jordangrayconsulting.com) is strictly intended to be viewed by persons over the age of 18. This is your job to deal with it, even if you have no idea what to do. Does it make them angry? So how could I not see the strength and courage in his tears? Men who break free of their conditioning to not cry are the furthest thing from weak, they are courageous.

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